I thought I wouldn’t talk about this again but today I am back at it. Please bear with me and suffer that I may speak on this topic one more time. This is going to be a long one.
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If you want to talk about a man who is indeed acting like a DOG, on all aspects, I’ve seen it, I’ve heard it. Up close. No jokes. Things that would literally cause your jaw to drop if I started to tell you about them. They are so many I get overwhelmed trying to put them into words so I just keep it all inside.
I have seen some very horrible things at a very young age. Those shaped my perspective at a point. When I was between the ages of 16 and 19, I decided I was not going to get married. It was not worth it.
In my eyes, men were the most horrible creatures to ever walk the earth.
How a husband would for exemple make his wife whom he vowed to love and honour for life, apologise to his mistress (who was once wifey’s best friend) because mistress said wifey did God knows what to her and she must apologise by all means if she wants peace in her home, baffles me. If one of the mistresses should get pregnant, the child is given to wifey to raise after she gives birth while husband would not even provide housekeeping and feeding money but wifey can’t raise her voice or complain, because she’d be bitten blue black and tagged a bad and rebellious wife. It baffles me how a husband can force his wife to abort their baby because he didn’t want to have any more kids with her. Understand, he is trying to please his newest catch. So if wifey chooses to keep that baby, it’s on her.
It baffles me how after roaming the streets getting under as many skirts as possible, getting terribly ill, being abandoned by everyone but the same wife he hurt, said husdband would still go back to his old ways. After wifey has used her energy, time and resources to nurse husband back to life, he automatically goes back to treating wifey like trash once he is back on his feet. The only reason wifey was even still there to literally save his life was that she refused to leave when he repeatedly asked her to pack her things and leave his house at some point. Believe it or not, all these are true life stories and you’ve not heard the half of it.
I am having flashbacks and tearing up as I type this. I used to be filled with so much anger, so much rage all day long; so much disgust for men and some men in particular. My heart was bleeding inside.
Tell me. What appeal can marriage have for someone like me who has seen such things and not just with one couple ? Or what good can I see in a man when I look at one ??
By now, I should have joined some advocacy/activism movement and be on the hunt for the head of every man that crosses my path. 😈😈😈 I did not say anything 😆🙌🏾.
You wanna talk about justifications ?? I have plenty for you.
I should be one of the people who would righteously feel justified to tag men with every bad name possible. I have seen different shades of the human being called man and 80% of what I saw was nothing close to pretty but GOOOOOD !!! Shout with me “GOOOOOOD” !!! 😂
I grew up and I decided I HAD A CHOICE AFTER ALL. So I chose.
I chose to believe that it doesn’t matter what I have seen, heard and experienced, NOT ALL MEN are the same.
I chose to make a 180° turn, believe and confess the total opposite of what my reality was.
I chose to believe that not all men are monsters.
I decided to call these prior beliefs of mine what they truly are : LIES !
Did my believing in Jesus and having a relationship with him had a part to play in this. Absolutely! By travelling down this path, I came into contact with wonderful men, father figures who really stood up to the test and walked the talk so that also helped greatly. Even with this, I could have chosen not to see their exemple as anything and stick to the negative ones I have always known because lived experiences are a strong thing.
Am I here “shouting this shout” because I am getting something out of it ? Is someone paying me for this “propaganda” ? You guys would read this, give me some fans and then what ? Is it because I am trying to be A PICK ME ?
Some would say I am but the question is : what would I be getting out of demonising every male out there ? What would I get out of keeping bitterness and anger inside ?
I read somewhere that bitterness and anger are like poison kept in a container and you are the container. Truly, the poison only damages the container.
You might be thinking I must have met some sweet man out there at some point who has swept me off my feet and shown me that indeed good men still exist. It was rather the opposite. The most recent one left me so completely shocked and traumatised, I felt like I was watching myself act a horror movie. I would wake up in the middle of the night and just cry. Yeah, it was that bad.
But I held on !!! I held on to my belief. I refused to believe and say that every man out there is the same because they are not. Really.
This plenty grammar I just wrote is the reason why to me, if you see anybody in this life, on these streets who is singing the jazz of “All women are evil” “All men are evil” , they made a choice. It’s as simple as that. People are evil. People are good. Wether man or woman. It really has nothing to do with gender. The Bible says that the human heart is desperately wicked.
I am not here to invalidate your experiences, however they are but I am saying no justification is ever enough to make unflattering generalizations about one gender group because of what one or a few of the members of that group might have done to you. If you must scream and kick around by all means then be fair and address that one person who hurt you. Add their street name, house number, phone number and even the name of their dog (Bingo or Blackie. Ain’t it 🌚 ?) if you like but be sure to keep it at that.
All that negativity isn’t going to do you good anyway. You’d think you’re somehow hurting those who hurt you but in actual fact, you’re only harming yourself, preventing yourself from fully embracing life and unearthing all the beauty that’s inside you.
This line is for you christians. As Stephanie Selaewoenam Adenyo rightfully said last time : “sometimes we decide to stay mad at people whom God had forgiven long ago”. They have asked for forgiveness, received it and they are freely moving on with life while we keep dragging that burden with us. We keep pointing God back to that fault, that scar that person left us, expecting some punishment or revenge to be exacted on them on our behalf and God isn’t minding us because He has moved on from that matter long ago and we also should have by now. [Chaii, this one is hitting me, myself and I hard 😅🙈🙊]
Bottom line is : YOU ALWAYS HAVE A CHOICE. So what’s it going to be ?? 😊
#RantOver #IHope #YouPeopleShouldNotMakeMeTalkAboutThisAgainOh #HumanBeingsAreBad #ItsReallyNotAGenderIssue #OpenYourEyes
PS : Heya ! It’s been a while. Thank you so much for reading. It’s so good to have you here. I hope you enjoyed this. Go ahead and SHARE. Don’t KEEP THIS TO YOURSELF and don’t forget to SUBSCRIBE FOR MORE.
Xoxo
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