Quiet sometime ago, I was scrolling through some pictures on Facebook, when I saw this. MY GOODNESS ! I was “on ne peut plus” horrified*. I felt…disapointed, sad, angry, disgusted. I felt provoked. That a woman (most probably) should give such advice to her fellow women?  Who makes these kind of stuffs, for God sake?


 And here is another one :


All men are cheats, but if you find one who truly loves you, he’ll make sure you never find out about his unfaithfulness

I don’t even know where to begin from. I’ve been so mesmerised by this line of thought that for a long time, though I wanted to write about it, I’ve not been able to. I just can’t seem to find the words to tell you what I think, but here, let me give it a try.

I’m gonna put on my “spiritutu” coat here. Allow me to dive deep a bit. hahaa! Not so deep though.
This world is made up of two realms: the physical realm which we all live in and see with our eyes, and the spiritual or supernatural realm which the human eye cannot perceive; some human beings can see into that realm with their physical eyes though. oops. Lets leave that matter for some other time.

So, whatever you see manifested or occurring in the physical, happens only  because, it has already happened in the spiritual. Remember, that before being human beings, we are spirit beings in a fleshly envelope. Alright. How do things materialise from the spiritual into the physical realm? It is simply BY WORDS and also by thoughts. Thoughts are very loud in the spirit realm. Yes, those very thoughts you think and those very words you say everyday. That is why you must be careful what you say, think or feed your mind with, for you are calling things into being. Many people don’t know it, but most of the misfortunes that happened to them, did as a result of things they said in an idle moment mostly accompanied by anger, frustration or despair.

So please, people are free to go down that road but you don’t have to follow them down there. They can go ahead and believe the absurdities written in those two images, but persanally, no one can ask or convince me to come down that road with them.
Why won’t you get a man who will cheat on you, if you believe things like that? What makes my heart ache the more, is the fact that even some among the elects of GOD, believe in those lies from the devil.

Think about this:
if I can get you to firmly believe in something, be it harmful or good. Then you most likely won’t try to fight that thing when it happens to you, right ? That is exactly how the devil operates. He gets you to believe the lie, then you are at his mercy when it happens to you, ‘cos you don’t think there’s any other possibility, you think that’s the way it is! A woman who goes into marriage thinking that all men are liars and cheats and it’s normal, will get exactly that: a cheating and lying husband. YOU ATTRACT WHAT YOU BELIEVE IN.

 DO NOT BE DECEIVED! It shall be done to you according to your expectations and declarations. I’m sorry but I have to tell you the truth; ok, actually I’m not sorry: SOME OF YOU LADIES, NEED TO UPGRADE YOUR THINKING SYSTEM, YOUR THOUGHT LIFE. What do you think of yourself? I said this earlier on, that we all have this invisible price tag on our foreheads

(read more here: BEYOND THE SURFACE) before we even meet a guy and while we’re walking about. The spirit realm sees that price tag too! Do you believe that there are good and faithful men out there whom GOD will give to those who delight in Him, honour him and wait on Him? Or you believe in those lies the world tries to feed you:

– all men are dogs…

– good men are a mirage so just settle with whatever is ‘ok’ or ‘acceptable’… (acceptable according to WHO ?)

– you won’t get a man unless you snatch him from someone else…

– if you have a man who loves you and cares about you enough to hide an affair from you, keep him and be content…





What kind of love is that? Remember that love comes with respect. You shouldn’t have to know if good men are hard to find or not. Sis, you are the one supposed to be found!

I would however not deny the fact that, all men carry in themselves, the possibility of cheating (same goes for women), because nowadays they are “lambasted” with temptations on all fronts: signboards, adverts, movies, music etc…all contain sexually enticing images and messages that encourage them to let their pants loose at every street corner. But Oh! I BELIEVE IN GOOD MEN!
Yes I do! God-fearing, tongue speaking, Bible chewing and purity protecting men who are of a different kind of spirit, who are acquainted with the God kind of love and will teach their sons after them, how to love their wives like Christ loves the Church. Men who tap daily into God’s grace and strength to overcome carnality, lust and unfaithfulness, who remain good and give hope to our daughters. I SALUTE YOU ALL!


I know this fine (eeehrm, please, this is solely in relation to his writing skills) gentleman and renown writer, shout out to Mr Seth Tele Hassan, who wrote an article titled : THE WINDOW OR THE DOOR ? I advice you go visit : or the Facebook page: Goldinwords, and read it (lots of other amazing reads await you there). He is basically saying that the way you get or acquire something in the first place, determines whether you’re gonna be able to keep that thing or not; it determines whether you are the real owner or not.

So if you think that the only way of getting a man is simply to be the highest ‘shareholder’ in his life, you’re in for a rude awakening my dear, ‘cos this is exactly what getting in through the window is.

The kind of man you allow into your life, is a direct reflection of what you think of yourself! YES!

Let me tell you what I think when it comes to myself:
I think I deserve better. I think I deserve the best. I think I am GOD’s silver, or gold vessel, adorned with precious stones, so as long as I am His and for His use, the Master will only keep me for noble use and thus, will never give me to someone who’s wood or clay, so if that happens, it can only be by my own doing. No offence. The world isn’t supposed to tell me how I should think or what I should believe in, it should be the other way round, ‘cos I have the words of truth.

So, how about you dear ?

I’m still looking to find a single Bible verse which tells me that it’s ok to lower my standards.

FB_IMG_1453743578648You may tell me that I’m living in a fairy tale world, and that is somehow true: christians have their world in this world. But it’s nothing like a fairy tale, it’s the realest thing ever. You may tell me I’m crazy but that’s ok. No revolution ever happened with people thinking like everyone else.

To end my bitter cry, let me cite Rev Mrs. Faith Oyedepo, who perfectly puts it this way:


…Before we got married, my husband and I made discoveries from God’s word that made us expect a hitch-free marriage. Till today, those expectations have not been cut off.

Exerpt from the her Book: MAKING MARRIAGE WORK


*I was on ne peut plus horrified: not possible to be any more horrified than I was.



  1. Fanny Eyram says:

    o yes! i use to say to my ladies that whatever they want to see in their marriage, the will see it. Of course if you want a man full of love, well dressed, full of beauty anointing (hehehe) you just start declaring it. it the same thing with the baby. dear sis take my example, for i experienced it before and i am still in it. God bless You Constante


  2. Rhodie says:

    Can’t agree with u more Constante. U truely get what u dream of. I get so tired of hearing people say that sexual purity before and even after marrige is literally impossible. There are people who’ll just not believe that keeping their virginity till marriage or staying faithful to one man or woman ur whole life is possible. Sadly, what they ask for is usually what they get.
    Once again Uve proved that there are still some really amazing writers out there. Checkarrrrr girl….


  3. Ms Hesse says:

    Great stuff there.
    Good to know there’s still those ladies who believe in what ought to be believed in!
    More grease, Miss !


  4. Tele says:

    Yayy! Shout out to lil ol’ moi?? Go meee! But seriously, thanks Constante. I’m glad you liked my article there. And you’re doing a wonderful job here too. Keep it up 😉


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